come across serious matter.

Being a growing teenage wasn't easy n wasn't as simple as ABC. well well wellllllllll.
i cant sleep due too over think this not so important matter. For teenage at my age they've been dream high for marrying people they love, go to places they want to go with people they love and spend time with their love one. and etc.

well none of this thing in my head. indeed memang la semua org nak have this kind of dream but i'm setting my head in reality, keep living in reality which i cant get all this. Who knows i might marry someone i dont love, i dont even know and i dont know how to spend my life with him. Ya Allah. this is one of the most scariest thing. Dah kalau marrying somebody u never know, i prefer not to have a big ceremony wedd, cukup la panggil close frens and family atas dasar i've end my bachelorette year. Can i face that ? hmmmm entah lah.

some fren berangan pegi europe or any country ngan BS mereka. but me prefer go first as a backpacking traveller cuz we never know our fate once we marry somebody. Mungkin langsung xde chance to go.To be honest i want to have a dream of marrying somebody who love travelling n photography like me, but i have no gut to dream this off, which i dont know why. In reality w dont exactly have someone we ever dream of, someone we want to spend the rest of our life with. susah n scary nak cakap but not all people are lucky enough to dream this . seriously.

This kind of pemikiran is not because i'm too attach with single life, but because i keep saying to myself i'm living in reality, REALITY and this is REAL LIFE. We dont have those fairytale slife story macm lagu taylor swift, and we wouldnt know the future of the marriage that build later jugak. Lucky enough if u marry someone u love n love u back unconditionally. Be thankful to Allah for that, for those feeling He gave you .
because feeling that we feel is from Him. Try to feel those feeling if u have with different people. That's y people said we cant force feeling.

Because i'm not into this kind of thing i prefer to focus on my dream , keep my self busy and focus on study and what i want to do.
Keep my year count and leave all this fate and rahsia Allah thingy to Allah The Almighty.

Who am i to fall in love with stranger n keep the feeling
and who am i to deny what Allah had wrote for me.
Rabbi yassir wala tuassir.
wishing for the best and i wish that if there's someone Allah keep for me, he'll guide me to be the more tolerate me, responsible cute me, and the solehah daughter for my parent . amin.
if he were about to change me to something i'm not supposed to and wont let me balas jasa my parent, i wont consider him no matter how. Allah knows what inside and what i want to give back to my parents, and all this while i keep asking Allah to hold my heart not to fall for any stranger until the right one he made for me . if any.

now that i'm

21 : planning to finish off my third year, do another networking in AIESEC & expose myself to work in QS field after sem 2.

22 : Final year. will try my best . graduation trip and still considering the place.
23 : Pay back to what i've gain. bonded n work . see what i can do hehee
24 : Bonded year end and applying for something serious. insya Allah, pls ease this dream ya Allah.
25 : Depends on the dream at 24 whether full filled or not and plan B. hihi + travel and backpacking!
26 and above : insya Allah will plan more if Allah panjangkan umur. amin.

for whatever i wrote here, i'll come back to check on this if lupa.

till then.